Archive for February 2011
I feel I have written enough fuzzy blog posts about what I’m feeling, vaguely even touching on the subject on what I’m doing.
Even now, I have no idea what I want to write or say, but somehow, I need to get this out of my system. Bear with me.
It turns out the business deal I got from my life coach in November, the stuff I have been planning for the last three months won’t be happening this year.
My coach and I got a great connection during the three months he was coaching me and I also met his wife. It was an interesting meeting to which I had to hitch-hike, and we met in a hotel lobby in my home town, to which she had traveled.
With the risk of sounding fluffy again, I reflected a lot in her, almost as if I saw pieces of myself. Either way, she was good energy all around which only confirmed that this business deal to become a part of her expanding network, a franchisee if you will, provided that I registered my own company, felt 100% right.
People were encouraging and said I would fit perfectly as a job coach; guiding and motivating people in their job searching process, helping them sharpen their CV’s and applications, provide interview-training and presentation techniques. Yeah, I do think I could have been a good resource.
I was excited about the possibility to work for myself, with the support of the coach couple. I was open to all the things I’d learn along the way and I was ready to put other plans on hold.
It also had great prospects financially, and was somewhat of a safe deal because job coaching in Sweden has been funded by the Swedish government through the unemployment agencies. This meant that already with a few clients I could be sure to have a normal income, a possibility not many people first starting up a business have.
I was given an opportunity to get on a train that was full steam ahead.
But then New Years came. And with it, new political decisions. 900 job coaches in Sweden were dismissed and because it had been a political initiative from the new government, the opposition had to label it wrong and media was quick to catch on.
Someone had put brake pads on the train.
I waited for almost two months for a decision from the unemployment agency whether I could start working or not. But even now, no one seems to know where the train is going and I am starting to realize that the timing isn’t right, that I’m stuck at the station.
So here I am checking the board again…where to?
Ironically, I have written about trains many times in the past.
Should I begin to see a pattern?
the old lady with the emerald green eyes looked at me;
so what say you child about the expansion of the Universe?
tell me, what do you see?
a color spectrum of circumstances
scattered, but held by an inexplicable design
gems of space, jewels of time,
a myriad of possibilities down the line
with a tilt, what once was a flower
becomes the shape of a star;
mesmerized by the illusion
that anything is far
the Universe is expanding
at a speed outside my understanding
but beauty is elusive
the slightest change of direction
a minor movement of will
a single droplet of dreams
and the patchwork is bound to burst
at the seams
* The first part is actually a true story, and the second part was inspired by my Italian kaleidoscope. I don’t know if the parts actually belong together or if this poem is even done. It has a few alternative versions but I’ll leave it as it is for now.
Expect the best, plan for the worst,
and prepare to be surprised.
I told you about the Spotify song titles poetry right?
Actually it was for H&M on Facebook and a free 6 months Spotify Premium account was the prize.
So it turns out H&M liked my flirt with fashion-playlist.
And I was announced as one of the winners!
How cool is that?!
Here’s the link to my: playlist
And if you want to add me as a user: hgrundell
And if you haven’t downloaded Spotify on you computer (which you should – over 10 million tracks for free streaming), here’s a print screen pic on my song titles poetry:
Oh, and I’ve caught a cold so that gives me a good excuse to stay in, listen to music, write and read, while drinking lots of herbal, ginger and honey tea.
This morning I woke up with a sore throat.
Although I had promised to run some errands for my grandmother, with a quick glance outside my window – minus twelve degrees and heavy snowfall – I decided to ask if she could wait another day or two for the marmalade.
First of all, she wants this particular marmalade because it’s the cheapest. Second, she’s half blind so she needs help with shopping. And third, she likes it when people do stuff for her.
I asked her how she was doing.
First of all, to be polite. Second, because I care for her.
I know it should be the other way around but after many years of constant illness, depression and inconsiderate talk, my grandmother’s negative energy is like a disease in itself.
I tried to get her in a better mood, make her focus on the positive side of things but her negative thoughts and words were like big, dark clouds that overshadowed everything.
It was so obvious when we had hung up the phone how I myself, had been affected – or infected – by the negativity.
I found myself calling both my mother and my best friend to complain and thereby ignoring all the advice I give to others and worse yet, spreading the bad energy bug.
The fact that I’m feeling sick and emotional today is no excuse but maybe an explanation.
Sometimes, we get so caught up with what other people say or do, that we forget to pay attention to our own words and actions.
With what kind of energy and expectations did I speak to my grandmother?
How did this effect the negative turn of our conversation?
How could we have better communicated?
If grandma on this side of the family is negative, my other grandma’s positive spirit balances up more than enough.
Today I got a little envelope. When I opened it there was a newspaper clip with regards from positive grandma. The article was about job coaching which we spoke about on the phone a few days ago. For fun, she had put a little tiny stone on top of the A in coach – because the sound of “OA” becomes the Swedish letter Å.
Coåch. Made me smile.
And remember that a considerate act speaks volumes more than words.
…let us risk remembering
that we never stop silently loving
those we once loved out loud.
From The Dance – Oriah Mountain Dreamer
Today I’ve been missing Cape Town.
Maybe because it’s Sunday…
The best day for having pancakes for breakfast.
I would add a delicious Mocha from Vida e Caffé or herbal tea at Birds.
Before heading to Camps Bay or Clifton Beach.
The next question is only whether to have a Strawberry Daiquiri at Harbour House in Kalk Bay…
At the Mandela Rhodes roof top pool…
Or make one at home?
Unless I’d spend the day at Strandloper enjoying their wicked seafood and paella buffet.
Or join the braai party at Mzoli’s in the township Gugulethu.
Back in town, just for the mere contrast and because I could, I would probably grab a seriously sinnful macaroon and espresso in the trendy Cape Quarter mall.
Now of course, I could also have chosen an active day, climbing Table Mountain…
Or Lion’s Head…
Or bike out to Hout’s Bay.
I could try kitesurfing in Muizenberg, scuba diving or water-skiing…
Or why not parasail to La Med just in time for sundowners?
Where I could stay and enjoy the evening as local band Goldfish starts playing.
But it would be a shame not to benefit from Beluga’s half price sushi & coctails special.
And later take a short ride down Sea Point to Buena Vista that serves the best mojito’s and doubtlessly the dirtiest dancing.
The night could finish there, or somewhere underneath the stars…
But the most beautiful part, is that the next day would offer new adventures, possiblities and experiences.